2015 – Like Tears in Rain

blade-runner-tears-in-rain

JANUARY

Harbor Accelerator kicks of Cohort IIIcreating a polar vortex that drives the last snow-bird to finally settle in the tri-county area.

FEBRUARY

After realizing it is too cold to swim in the winter, some bored Ohio transplants create The Lowcountry Angel NetworkOriginally intended as a committee to put to rest the debate about whether the dress is blue and black or white and gold, it quickly mutates into a forum for rich folks to talk each other out of putting money into promising, but risky ideas.

MARCH

Th3 Pr0wn joins Shrimp and Bits. Abbott and Costello.  Tango and Cash. Captain and Tennille. Chocolate and cheese.  Extra Crispy and Original Recipe.  You complete me.

On a more positive note, Echovate launches in beta.  Having finally gotten all the buzzwords in the right font, The Big E hits the streets for realz.  At long last Charleston has a tech company in the hiring and employee management sector.

APRIL

Teamphoria wins the Harbor Accelerator pitch contest.  The threat to “Build, measure, and grow a thriving company culture” frightened the judges into acquiescence.  Finally Charleston has a tech company in the hiring and employee management sector.

The DIG SOUTH three ring is rung.  Keynote Gary Vaynerchuk (literally) swears by the virtues of micro-targeting wine-swilling ivy league types (no joke), while local developers huddle together in rain-soaked tents outside a local cinema, trying to find Charleston Open Source’s github account.  Maybe someone should check SourceForge.  The parties were unquestionably sweet, but we look forward to a return to the right side of the Cooper.

MAY

Charleston rolls out a keg of Coors to greet Steve Case’s Rise of the Rest.  The Governor (and daughter of Eminem) appeared to greet the giant-novelty-check-wielding AOL Founder and when he landed a helicopter powered by his own sense of self worth on the deck of the Yorke Towne.  Local favourite Bidr took home the 100K – this hot on the heels of having scarfed down an investment appetizer of 10K just a few days previous at DIG SOUTH.

JUNE

Productivity takes a big hit with the launch of Charleston Tech Slack, probably the best thing to happen to tech in Charleston since the invention of the deep fryer.

The annual Chstech CEO wage fixing retreat kicks off in the Bahamas. The CEOs of Boomtown, PeopleMatter, and BlueAcorn all participate.  Taking a break from lighting cigars with fistfuls of burning stock options, they find a fallen piece of SpaceX‘s latest “that’s no moon” space station and vow to rebuild it even larger.

Giant UX kicks off their annual conference.  Bearded-ness reaches dangerously high levels.

JULY

The Harbor Entrepreneur Center brings One Million Cups to Charleston.  Jumpy startup founders get a chance to pitch to a hyper-caffeinated audience.  This process leads to literally zeroes of funding deals.

AUGUST

Job Market Maker raises $1M from mysterious investors.  After a long wait, Charleston has a tech company in the hiring and employee management sector.

Investors pump $34M into PokitDok, promising a major pivot after PokitDok’s first product, PokitPool, achieves lackluster penetration. 

Shrimp and Bits’ coverage of the S.P.A.R.C. (So Proud About Recent Coredumps) Hackathon elicits outrage in the community and a full on nerd war.

SEPTEMBER

Ex-CTO of S.P.A.R.C. (System Positive Androids for Regional Carnivals) raises $2M for Questis and finally solves the first world problem of having employees that don’t know what to do with their money.  Who ever thought Charleston would have a tech company in the hiring and employee management sector?

Despite a 1000-year flood event, the Harbor Entrepreneur Center announces cohort IV tributes who are immediately whisked away to the Capitol.

PharmRight raises $1.2M to develop a durable single-cup coffee maker for the galactic navy.  

Would-be entrepreneurs at Charleston’s 2nd annual Startup Weekend pitch their ideas, then decide to change their venue to the line outside the Apple store waiting on the iPhone 6s.

OCTOBER

PharmRight launches a sequel – Series A: The Search for More Money.

Revolve Conference brings together a bunch of creative types on the beach to launch Revolve 2016: Here we go again!

Back to the Future Day passes with no sign of McFly.

NOVEMBER

At BarcampCHS 7, Eugene Mah and Gray Somerville team up to make a million dollars creating a social network where people communicate in binary code via radio frequency.

Raycom buys Purecars.  More cars on the road means more demand for personal injury law ad slots.

Consultancy S.P.A.R.C. (Slumber Parties And Rowdy Coders), is finally gives in to late night booty calls from Booz Allen.  Coders still wonder if S.P.A.R.C. (Should Participate Artfully in Re-assuring Coders) settled.

Phishlabs raises $7M B Round. If B stands for “bait” were gonna make a B-line outta here.

Open Angler raises $500k to expand fishing charters. An investigation opens into the cause of October’s flooding.

Jericho, Inc. launches Avondale incubator, art gallery, and Mellow Mushroom parking.

Peuri Elemental wins the Harbor Accelerator Perfect Pitch competition.  The bonking economy heats up.

Vaga Co begins a series of pop-up co-working events, prompting a water shortage when the work from home crowd finally hits the showers before heading out into the world.

DECEMBER

While developers are distracted by Star Wars: The Force Awakens, a fluff piece in Forbes prophecies the rise of Lake Avenue Ventures.

Nate DaPore splits from PeopleMatter, a Charleston tech company in the hiring and employee management sector.  Along with Eric Bowman of Teamphoria, he joins the Charleston Metro Chamber of Commerce to make a push to attract more businesses in the under-served hiring and employee management sector.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s